My Exam

Its that time again. Its one of those much awaited yet dreaded moments that happen once every few months, I cant wait for it to be over.

A few days before the D-day, I’m filled with anticipation, paranoia, worry and hope. I begin preparations a few days in advance. I start reading up on the internet, make copious notes and start prepping myself. I start getting my list of questions ready. And my list of answers. I even start to prep my son and hubby. And yet, I often wonder what good this last minute preparations can do to me.

A day in advance I ready my bag, put my papers in – a few spares, my records. I check and re-check if I have the time and date right.
In my head, I have planned out the route, the time to leave home, the meal I would have to prepare in advance. Everything is planned and thought of.

I ready myself to meet the examiner.

The examiner is a gentle, soft speaking grand-dad type person. He’s been an examiner for the past 40 years and has seen countless anxious, over-wrought people like me. He talks to me about the subject of my thesis. He examines the fruit of my toil gently with a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eyes. My thesis is unwieldy – and somehow resists all attempts at being put to order. He questions me – and gently encourages me in my efforts. He offers tips to handle tricky problems, even laughing at hubby's attempts to be helpful.

He checks my records – marks his observations.
Then he pats me on my shoulder “that’s a job well done. Growth is plotting out fine. Your milestones are being met.” and that’s his sign to tell us – our exam is over. His smile tells us – like every time – looks like we’ve made it with flying colors.

On his way out he looks at my son and says “for being such a good boy – we’re gonna give you some shots – I’m sorry child – but the nurse will be here soon”. And with that my son’s pediatrician walks out of the room.

And that’s how ends my son’s quarterly physical exam. Much anticipated – yet much dreaded. And I have one today. Pray for me.